26 01 2009

It’s exactly ten years.

I still miss her, and there’re several things that always remind me of her.

#1. Yan Yan strawberry-flavoured snack – she bought it for me before going for her leg op when I was in primary 1 or 2.

#2. Mee sua – she always cooked it with her home-made chilli sauce. It always feels special because she would only cook one bowl just for me. And that’s why mee sua is one of my comfort foods.

#3. Wella hair products – I don’t use the brand anymore, but it reminds me of her because she stocked up on the brand’s shampoo for me when she suspected something was probably very wrong with her body.

#4. Cut fruits, especially watermelon. Whenever she bought a watermelon, she would cut a portion up into cubes.. and yes, just for me.

#5. Exams. I used to have exam phobia in primary school. She would always stay up with me when I was studying, saying she just wanted to watch TV. And she would hold my hand to sleep the night before the exam.

A colleague was sharing his learning points from a workshop he attended in HK. One way of processing the bereavement experience was to share how the deceased person has impacted or left an imprint on one’s life.

For me, my straightforward, independent and perfectionist tendencies definitely come from her. It helps for me to know that a part of her is still alive in me. The ongoing challenge for me is to learn how to calibrate and moderate those qualities.

I certainly had a very meaningful reunion dinner last night. It was the exact 10th year. And it marked my first Chinese New Year as a working adult with me giving my dad a small token 🙂




One response

24 03 2009

hugs gal… 🙂

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